whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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