Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
