that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
