Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
