it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
i think my cat just said my name.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
