like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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