And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
