Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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