I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
