Plan B is the new Plan A
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
