I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
BRING THE BAGELS
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
