It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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