Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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