Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
