I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
