some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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