Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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