He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
