She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
