i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
