I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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