wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
