just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
