Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
