I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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