It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
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