i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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