last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
