i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
