I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
