i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
