my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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