i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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