Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Acid is not a monday night drug
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
