so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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