You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
