There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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