none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
This is classic penis vs brain.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
