My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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