I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
