White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I touched a dick in church today
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
