Apparently you make a good broom.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
