I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
