Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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