yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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