it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
