So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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