cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
