I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
