We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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