i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
